at your right hand...

that one old, forgotten key…oh look now, look now, fresh beats, full blood, full flight, and ah, bright beautiful wings.

lord, i have lived in rites 
that don’t fit your heart, 
i think of the numbers i counted 
the pressure to fit in, to correspond 
to what they thought, 
i heard my name morphed into a thousand different forms, 
and oh i would be affirmed if only 
i would minimize myself,
turn a blind eye 
but they didn’t know, they didn’t know,
they thought they called a puppet 
someone who they could stuff for full pews
and multiply for a favor with winks and scares
but they didn’t know, 
they were calling a prophet, 
the cloud the size of a man’s hand, 
so small, so quiet, shouting inside, 
using that voice to lance himself, 
but oh so deep, 
the wounds only bleed you, 
led through the grates and sewers to 
the one who they found most fragrant and i 
followed my feet and knees smeared with unthinkable things, 
there odorus, unthinking, repugnant, and willing
i collapse again and 
again on that cage they put you in, 
the locks jangled, shaking the dark, but 
so strong, unflinching, and it took seasons, even sleepless nights, until 
i saw the way through, and felt you too, 
leaning against the bars, leaning toward me, 
leaning in, and found in your face the bravery to 
grasp the lock and, yeah (oh yeah) that old key i’d forgotten, i held it, though 
all their names called it a category, it was just me, and then,
with a click, it unlocked you, and i couldn’t believe the wings, the firey eyes, 
the rage, the fury, the light, the purity, oh it was heaven, it was heaven, i didn’t know, 
i didn’t know, it’s all i wanted, oh down so deep, down there, all you wanted, all you know, all i wanted all along, all you wanted, that one old, forgotten key…oh look now, look now, fresh beats, full blood, full flight, and ah, bright beautiful wings.